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No matter what happened to get you to reside in the funk you are currently in, life will get you out, if…
That is a big if. Sometimes, the head of steam you had going takes an alternate route that leads you into a feeling of going 100 miles an hour in reverse. That route could have led you into a large obstacle. Or maybe it was a series of smaller obstacles–maybe it was a combination of the two.
I have been in this kind of funk. I have believed stories provided to me by Resistance. That dude is quite the liar. But still, I’ve lost my way.
Maybe you’ve had times in your life where you felt like you had lost yours too. Maybe that is where you are right now.
I would like to offer you three steps I’ve found useful to begin the trek back.
1. Take Responsibility
This, I feel, should be your first step. I say that from my own experience. Taking responsibility for the things you have control over in your life is useful. Don’t make excuses for why things aren’t the way you would like them to be. Rather, with open eyes, become fully aware of the myriad of ways that you have not been responsible. For whatever reasons, whatever justifications, whatever circumstances–own up to them.
Once you’ve identified all pertinent elements that you have control over, where you’ve failed, forgive yourself.
As quickly as you’ve forgiven yourself, accept the forgiveness as final. You are done. You are finished dragging yourself over the coals in a subversive subtle flagellation. It is time to let go.
A vitally important part of acceptance is drawing clear distinctions between that which you have control over and that which you do not. Look at this distinction for what it is: not your responsibility. Then, let go of any emotional attachment you might have over these things you have no control over. Accept it. Move on. Next!
3. Get Focused
You are not your past.
You are not your future.
You are your right now.
What matters now? Stop for a second or twenty and think about this question: what matters now? Not two years from now, not two years ago. Right now. Allow this question to guide you in getting focused. When I ask myself this question, it takes me awhile to get through all the crap that I think matters, but invariably has no real connection to the present moment.
I am not saying that planning for the future isn’t important. I am suggesting that you identify the action steps you can take right now. I have a difficult time with sustained focused. Yet, when I take a step back to understand why I’ve lost focus it always has something to do with being wrapped up in the past or future.
Vision + Focus over Time is the key equation for growth. And we all need to be growing in one way or another; it is a basic human need.
I hope that you find your way back. We need you to do so. And we might not even understand how badly.
And yes, I am kicking ass again. Put Resistance in its place. Kick some ass.